family rules

fell in love with this today...

hmmmm. hit play.

if i haven't said it lately, "i hate technology"

if you are looking at this blog, but dont hear music...hit the 'play' button at the bottom of the page :)

receiving...

isaiah 37:14-20
"Hezekiah received the letter from the messengers and read it. Then he went up to the temple of the Lord and spread it out before the Lord...."

when i RECEIVED my melanoma diagnosis, i immediately spread every care, concern, fear, worry and question before the Lord.  i didn't refuse to accept the diagnosis. i didn't doubt that the lab could call me and say, 'we made a mistake...it's not cancer'.  i didn't run to my computer to check my life expectancy. i didn't google the likelihood of me living to see my grandkids.

 i RECEIVED the disease, knowing i've been healed of all sin-sickness, knowing where i'm going - just not knowing the path i'm going to take to get there....thats up to Him.

i've been praying & just thinking on some scripture i like to call my 'no matter what' verses...(thank you bible study friends for helping brain storm:))

daniel 3:17-18   shadrach,meshach & abednego are about to be thrown in a fiery furnace for refusing to worship any other but the One True God..."the God we serve is able to save us from it, and he will rescue us from your hand, O king. But EVEN IF He does not..."

phillipians 1   paul talks about being in chains for Christ, convinced God wants him to remain in prison, convinced it would be better to depart this life and be with Jesus...but WHATEVER happens....it is for the author of creation to decide

isaiah 43:1-3   when you pass through the waters...when you walk through the fire...WHEN...not IF....troubles, trials and sickness will come

job 13:3-5   job is afflicted...and his friends are worthless physicians! suffering isn't always the result of sin...or a lack of  faith!

isaiah 8:18-20  to the law & to the testimony!! dont inquire of books...inquire of God and His Word...

so, i've been praying. my family has been praying. my friends have been praying.

yesterday, i went to the plastic surgeon for a follow up from surgery.
results = all clear. no cancer.

today, i went to the dermatologist for a full body scan.
results = all clear. no more melanoma.

was this because i have an insane amount of faith? because i had really Godly people praying, and if you added up everybody's faith and goodness, it surely cancels out everything bad?

friends, i'm not even gonna go there. God does as He pleases. long ago He ordained my days. i have nothing to trump His Sovereignty...HE IS ALMIGHTY GOD...MIGHTY TO SAVE.

i only asked for healing. but also said, 'no matter what...i'm gonna love you anyway. i trust YOU.'

so, thanks for all the prayers! i love you all...

if you're looking for me this summer, i wont be hard to spot....the lady w/ a big hat, long sleeves and a beach umbrella :)

so that people may see and know...

did you know that may is 'melanoma awareness month'?....i think this is almost funny...i'm a pretty organized person, and even my melanoma diagnosis came in the right month :) i received the diagnosis on the 18th...melanoma day is actually the 15th....also typical of me, i have the best intentions of being on time, but usually arrive a little late :)

let me back up:

a few weeks ago, i was at BSF...monday morning leaders meeting...i was LATE...my messy hair hastily thrown in a PONY TAIL...i walked in the same time as another leader - HOLLY - and we both remarked about where we would have to sit...we sat next to each other for the first time...she sat at my LEFT. we made small talk, never really having talked before...and then dove into 2 hours of bible study.

at the end, holly looks at me and says, 'i'm going to sound like a freak, cuz I DONT KNOW YOU....but, have you ever had that mole checked before?'  she was referring to this flat irregular shaped mole on the left side of  my neck...smaller than a dime...my mom had mentioned something about it a month before...but i have like 500 moles, and figured it had been there forever...and not being super excited about paying to see a dermatologist, just to hear the words 'benign' wasn't high on my priority list...i've had moles checked before, and they were always normal...why would it be DIFFERENT this time?

well...my new friend holly was quite INSISTENT that i get checked...she told me a story about her sister-in-law, who died after a long battle with melanoma...it was heart breaking...and thats all it took...that pleading look in holly's eyes...i got the name of HER dermatologist...and made an APPOINTMENT

when i went to the doctor,the first thing i see as i walk in the office is a sign tht says 'WELCOME...and the passage from isaiah 55:12'...thank you God...a reminder that you KNOW me...in the examining room the doctor said, 'why are you here?'...my only response was, 'a girl in my bible study told me she didn't like the looks of a mole'....i had no other explanation

fast forward...it IS melanoma...it is SUPERFICIAL...LEVEL ONE...curable with minor surgery...it was caught EARLY....

PRAISE GOD...HE IS GOOD!

so...not liking attention...not wanting to make a big deal of things...i completely planned on keeping this info to myself...and then i saw that as being prideful...how would God receive any credit for how he orchestrated such a beautiful intervention on my behalf...

Isaiah 41:20

"so that people may see and know, may consider and understand, that the hand of the Lord has done this, that the Holy One of Israel has created it"

knowing how God doesn't like to waste ANY of our life experiences...

do you like the sun? do you love the beach? do you have freckles & moles? do you have the best of intentions with sunblock, but sometimes get burned?

go get checked.

right now.

make an appointment with a dermatologist.

it is so worth it.

agnus dei

agnus dei....lamb of God.

an eventful weekend.

thursday night, a call from my brother nobody wants to get. he is following an ambulance to the hospital...gracie's been hurt.

i love my brother...love his wife...love that girl like she's my own.

me, my mom and other brother all head to de vos children's and sit in the ER w/ kirk, court & gracie.

i'll spare the details...lots of unknowns...fears...just super emotional. LOTS OF PRAYERS.

meanwhile, we know my other sis-in-law should be flying from japan at this very moment...well, zak gets a text from april...there's a tsunami warning...no flights are going anywhere. more unknowns. LOTS OF PRAYERS.

going home at 2 a.m. with no answers. just praying and expecting God to show up. one thing i've learned recently is not to pray selfishly, but to trust Him completely. and know that he will work things out for His glory...and i'll praise Him no matter what.

so after watching some ugly tsunami footage in japan at 2:30 a.m. - i realize it wont do me any good. i listened to "agnus dei"...oh, how i LOVE that song. i KNOW that's heaven in a song. it brought me so much comfort...reminded me to look UP...

He is Holy...Almighty...Worthy...He reigns...He is completely Sovereign and in control of all things.

we have the assurance of salvation...the permanence of being engraved in the palm of His hand (isaiah 49:16)

i sent that song to kirk in the hospital, because i know he likes music and i thought it would be good to listen to while they stayed up there... i told him i like thrid day's version best, but couldn't find it

God faithfully answered our prayers...Gracie came home after a couple days w/ a concussion and a skull fracture...but she'll be o.k....April finally flew out from tokyo the next day and is home safe.

i've just been so thankful for an amazing family and a gracious God...

sunday morning i'm getting ready for church... i like to listen to pandora on my i-pod, but its been acting funny lately - always cutting out. i turned it on, and what was playing? AGNUS DEI by THIRD DAY!!!!! it played the whole song, i just shut my eyes & let the words sink in....and you know what? after the last note was played, it cut out...shut off. God just wanted me to hear that song - His gift to me :)

now i'm at church...i look at the bulletin. whats the first song we are going to sing?

AGNUS DEI

really?! we haven't sang that since easter...i had tears streaming down my cheeks the whole song.

i call my brother kirk, to tell him my agnus dei story...when i get done, he says, "you won't believe this...i'm just NOW watching that video you sent me, cuz i couldn't open it in the hospital"

God shows up all the time...you won't want to miss it.

Isaiah 49:16 See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands;

your walls are ever before me.

nine years old.

dawson jay ... nine years old ...it's true what 'they' say ...they DO grow up fast

...and we're out of the toy stage...anything football or U of M please.

go vikings!

uncle zak stopped by on his way to work and dropped off a present for dawson...auntie april is in malaysia, so zak was responsible for shopping and picking up a present...the boys thought he did excellent wrapping the present!

how did he do april? a PLAID sweatshirt (which he wore all night)...2 hats ...football cards...and $5...

he was in heaven :)

then uncle kirk, aunt court and the kiddos ...and grandma & grandpa came over for lots of fun...chicken alfredo, mac & cheese, strawberries & pound cake - ALL courtesey of costco...thank you very much :)

happy birthday sweet boy...we love you to pieces!

make my monday.

this made my day.

sick.

my baby is sick.

this is where we spent most of today.

he will not let me leave his side.

this is him at 7:30pm...he finally fell asleep. and i couldn't resist taking a pic.

i love my buddy.

race #2...

another fun day at the races...february 12...i am just getting to posting...it was a super fun day...the sun was shining & warmer...@ 30 degrees and windy...i'm starting to get in the groove of where to park, what to pack, what to wear...but NOT HOW TO VIDEO TAPE :( ...

doug had THE BEST RACE I'VE EVER SEEN....it was SO unbelievably CLOSE - a total nail biter...everyone was seriously standing up and freaking out it was so close...and i was video taping the whole day...my dad and dad-in-law (along with everyone else) couldn't wait to watch it on tape...especially doug.

it was only 2 sleds...doug was racing a sled with a bigger motor...i dont think it was supposed to be that close - BUT IT WAS!!! in the last straight-away, doug blew a belt and lost by MERE INCHES.

and....it didn't record. i did something wrong. i blew it. i've got nothing. so sad. i felt sick. it is only a memory.

ugh.

dodge trying on daddy's race vest. wow, he is so cute!

i love how after a race, dodge has "pointers" for doug.

doug got a 1st place here...so fun

cool pic...this is doug & jason...it's jason's sled...thanks jason!

trying to quick replace the belt before the next race...thanks to amber for these sweet pics!

we end each race day with the trophy ceremony at the cozy establishment nearby...ok, warm bar-restaurant that serves food and has a real toilet...

always a lot of fun & such a cool thing to do with our family...its been fun for the grandparents too...and we've met some awesome people along the way...can't wait for this weekend!!

happy valentine's day

valentine's day is always just a special day at home...taking care to make it special, with candles and fancy dishes...well...fancy glasses anyway! i love that the boys get so excited by a table that is set extra special, they make stuff so fun!

packaging paper makes a great table runner...and the candles were from around the house...and my 3 favorite boys got a special sweet from me with a note for them

xoxoxo

chicken and rice...doug's favorite and the boys like too...so it was a very peaceful meal...everyone is happy!!

doug had the boys say something they loved about me...so sweet...

dodge: "i love it when she snuggles with me"

dawson: "i love her cuz she is always trying to make things special for us & doesn't even care if she gets anything or not"

LoVe.

snow fun.

yesterday, i could see grass everywhere...i didn't need my snow boots...i was starting to dream of spring.

today we got more snow. michigan.

 doug plowing himself out after the 'big blizzard' a couple of weeks ago...i thought it was fun...if it's gonna snow...please dump on us...yay snow days!

 dawson...wet, cold, and never enough dry snow stuff between 2 boys!

 path out to the barn...

 doug pulling the boys on 3-wheeler...

 february fun....winter in the woods...3 boys who LOVE snow...and a momma who is kinda missing the beach right now :)



following the call...

check out my friend's blog...amazing young family whose lives on the mission field in africa dramatically changed last week when their 5 year old daughter lola was daignosed with leukemia

http://followingthecall.org/

praying for matt, lindsey, lola & kia

really?

i know i did laundry this week.

i know i did. i know i did.

ugh.

delish.

wow!! we had REAL food a couple times this past week....you know its a big deal when i take a picture of food...it made my house smell like sundays at my grandma & grandpa beld's....mmm mmmm!

no, there was no gravy kirk.

winter fun

warning: the following is random & unorganized...my skin is crawling just thinking about it...however, since my separation from facebook...i will be doing a little catch up, and will try to update this blog at least weekly...

 me and a girlfriend took our boys to pando a few weeks ago...

buiskool boys + vruggink boys = 1 rowdy bunch!

                                                                                    

our passes were good for 3 hours...this is after 2 hours...they were cold, wet, & tired...PERFECT!

 boys and their toys...dawson (9) plowing with the 3-wheeler...dodge (7) blowing with the tractor...

doug (41) retired :)

 some of our friends at the races...bundle up!

let it snow! this is our christmas tree - we always put it up in the woods - we are due for a snow day...maybe this week?!

the winter months can be so L-O-N-G....kind of excited to be able to break it up with snowmobiling & racing...

C H O O S E

i was talking to a girlfriend the other day, and she did a really neat thing in her bible study...instead of a new year's resolution, they had to come up with one word that would define them...influence their decisions...and in general...keep them accountable.

what an interesting concept...in my bible study, we are studying the book of isaiah, and one theme seems to keep popping out at me...CHOOSE.

we have so many choices, dont we?

from what i wear, to what i eat, to how i spend my free time, how i give, where i work, relationships i want to invest in, parenting....the list goes on forever.

but there is a difference in how i make decisions and how others may make their decisions.

i'm by NO means perfect...not even close. but i pray every day that i make choices that bring me closer to God...positively influence others for Christ...that He would be glorified in the choices i make.

sometimes i fail miserably in a choice i make. i ask Him for forgiveness and wisdom.

other choices i make are just plain "out there" to some people.  i only want to please Him.

some choices are scary.  He says, "do not fear".

choosing takes on a whole new meaning when you have kids...or little eyes watching you...

Joshua 24:15...

 But if serving the LORD seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your forefathers served beyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the LORD.”

facebook

Facebook (stylized facebook) is a social network service and website launched in February 2004 that is operated and privately owned by Facebook, Inc.^[1] As of January 2011^[update], Facebook has more than 600 million active users.^[5][6] Users may create a personal profile, add other users as friends and exchange messages, including automatic notifications when they update their profile.

"How on earth did we stalk our exes, remember our co-workers' birthdays, bug our friends, and play a rousing game of Scrabulous before Facebook?"

At age 102, Ivy Bean of Bradford, England joined Facebook in 2008, making her one of the oldest people ever on Facebook. An inspiration to other residents of the care home in which she lived...At the time of her death in July 2010, she had 4,962 friends on Facebook and more than 56,000 followers on Twitter. Her death was widely reported in the media and she received tributes from several notable media personalities.

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wow. can anyone remember life without facebook? it's almost like trying to remember life before cell phones...life before e-mail...life before computers...life before mini-vans...most people know i am not a fan of technology...most people know i wish i was born 150 years ago...most people know i don't text (my cell phone is a dinosaur)...but i DO own an i-pod touch (shocking, i know)...and it has this little ap that makes it so-super-easy to check my facebook!!!

you see, i have a hate-hate relationship with the phone. e-mails helped remove some of the phone hassle of coordinating birthday parties & etc...but facebook made it FUN! you can put pictures of your family on it...private message long lost friends & relatives without bothering with the phone...its an awesome way to connect with people...maybe people you never even spoke to...while all this "connecting" is going on...i was slowly getting sucked into everyone elses "lives"...looking at their pics...seeing what their friends were writing on their walls...knowing what everyones is doing on any given night...comparing my facebook life to their facebook life...comparing my facebook kids to their facebook kids...wondering why that person wouldn't "friend" me (yes, it really happened...and i actually felt bad...so silly)...and wondering who in the world from pakistan wants to friend me (yes, that happened too...i hope it was some creepy mistake)...realizing, that i am checking that darn facebook EVERY TIME I HAVE A FREE MINUTE.

dont get me wrong. if you love fb, thats great. there are a lot of things i miss about facebook. there are a lot of good things about facebook. this might be a permanent break-up with facebook...or maybe i'll go back and really restrict how i use it...i'm not sure yet.

it was time for me to deactiveate. so i did.

and fb showed me profile pics of all the friends that would miss me if i decided to push the "deactiveate" button.

i dont know if fb knows this or not, but my friends are living breathing people that live in houses...not in my i-pod. geez.

lets go racing!

so...a long time ago...1994....doug & i were dating, and he was starting a new adventure: SNOWMOBILE RACING!...racing is in the guy's blood...he is super competitive...in fact, one of the very first things he ever spoke to me was this:

 "the thrill of speed overcomes the fear of death"

yikes.

because of a several reasons - he only raced that one year - then life kind of happened...his money found other places to go...ya know, marriage, houses, cars, student loans, having babies...you get the picture :)

fast forward to a few months ago...a guy who raced snowmobile previously, just couldn't do it anymore...he hurt his leg in an accident...and wondered if doug would be interested in driving his race sled.

ARE YOU SERIOUS?!

ummmmm.....yeah!

so, here we are...doug is racing a vintage snowmobile class...all the races are close by...only an hour north...every other weekend...totally family friendly...short sprint-type racing (not the 200+ laps like he used to do!)...it is so exciting!

this is before his very first time out on the track...posing with our very proud boys...i can definitely say racing this time around is SO MUCH MORE FUN!

grandpa & grandma beld all bundled up with dodge & dawson...i dont think it got much above 9 degrees that day, when you factor in that we are there all day, plus a little wind...it can get mighty cold

although, cold doesn't seem to affect kids much...front row seats!

#67

if the boys weren't watching races, they were wrestling in the snow. crazy.

this brings back memories: who doesn't remember getting a cold wet mitten on with your teeth?

dawson

pulling up to the start line

after every race, the boys would run up to the track to give doug a high-five as he drove off ... dodge jumped on the back for a little victory drive :)

speaking of victory, doug placed 1st, 2nd & 2nd in the three races he ran...

here's dawson, proud as a peacock!

oh...dodge was a little excited too!

so, yes it was F*R*E*E*Z*I*N*G, but oh, so much fun...another adventure beginning...

funny, sometimes when a phase ends in your life, you kind of wonder, how could it get more fun...be as exciting...or even be possible...and then God surprises you.