Tuesday, June 7, 2011

family rules

fell in love with this today...

Sunday, June 5, 2011

hmmmm. hit play.

if i haven't said it lately, "i hate technology"

if you are looking at this blog, but dont hear music...hit the 'play' button at the bottom of the page :)

Friday, June 3, 2011


isaiah 37:14-20
"Hezekiah received the letter from the messengers and read it. Then he went up to the temple of the Lord and spread it out before the Lord...."

when i RECEIVED my melanoma diagnosis, i immediately spread every care, concern, fear, worry and question before the Lord.  i didn't refuse to accept the diagnosis. i didn't doubt that the lab could call me and say, 'we made a mistake...it's not cancer'.  i didn't run to my computer to check my life expectancy. i didn't google the likelihood of me living to see my grandkids.

 i RECEIVED the disease, knowing i've been healed of all sin-sickness, knowing where i'm going - just not knowing the path i'm going to take to get there....thats up to Him.

i've been praying & just thinking on some scripture i like to call my 'no matter what' verses...(thank you bible study friends for helping brain storm:))

daniel 3:17-18   shadrach,meshach & abednego are about to be thrown in a fiery furnace for refusing to worship any other but the One True God..."the God we serve is able to save us from it, and he will rescue us from your hand, O king. But EVEN IF He does not..."

phillipians 1   paul talks about being in chains for Christ, convinced God wants him to remain in prison, convinced it would be better to depart this life and be with Jesus...but WHATEVER happens....it is for the author of creation to decide

isaiah 43:1-3   when you pass through the waters...when you walk through the fire...WHEN...not IF....troubles, trials and sickness will come

job 13:3-5   job is afflicted...and his friends are worthless physicians! suffering isn't always the result of sin...or a lack of  faith!

isaiah 8:18-20  to the law & to the testimony!! dont inquire of books...inquire of God and His Word...

so, i've been praying. my family has been praying. my friends have been praying.

yesterday, i went to the plastic surgeon for a follow up from surgery.
results = all clear. no cancer.

today, i went to the dermatologist for a full body scan.
results = all clear. no more melanoma.

was this because i have an insane amount of faith? because i had really Godly people praying, and if you added up everybody's faith and goodness, it surely cancels out everything bad?

friends, i'm not even gonna go there. God does as He pleases. long ago He ordained my days. i have nothing to trump His Sovereignty...HE IS ALMIGHTY GOD...MIGHTY TO SAVE.

i only asked for healing. but also said, 'no matter what...i'm gonna love you anyway. i trust YOU.'

so, thanks for all the prayers! i love you all...

if you're looking for me this summer, i wont be hard to spot....the lady w/ a big hat, long sleeves and a beach umbrella :)

Saturday, May 21, 2011

so that people may see and know...

did you know that may is 'melanoma awareness month'?....i think this is almost funny...i'm a pretty organized person, and even my melanoma diagnosis came in the right month :) i received the diagnosis on the 18th...melanoma day is actually the 15th....also typical of me, i have the best intentions of being on time, but usually arrive a little late :)

let me back up:
a few weeks ago, i was at BSF...monday morning leaders meeting...i was LATE...my messy hair hastily thrown in a PONY TAIL...i walked in the same time as another leader - HOLLY - and we both remarked about where we would have to sit...we sat next to each other for the first time...she sat at my LEFT. we made small talk, never really having talked before...and then dove into 2 hours of bible study.

at the end, holly looks at me and says, 'i'm going to sound like a freak, cuz I DONT KNOW YOU....but, have you ever had that mole checked before?'  she was referring to this flat irregular shaped mole on the left side of  my neck...smaller than a dime...my mom had mentioned something about it a month before...but i have like 500 moles, and figured it had been there forever...and not being super excited about paying to see a dermatologist, just to hear the words 'benign' wasn't high on my priority list...i've had moles checked before, and they were always normal...why would it be DIFFERENT this time?

well...my new friend holly was quite INSISTENT that i get checked...she told me a story about her sister-in-law, who died after a long battle with melanoma...it was heart breaking...and thats all it took...that pleading look in holly's eyes...i got the name of HER dermatologist...and made an APPOINTMENT

when i went to the doctor,the first thing i see as i walk in the office is a sign tht says 'WELCOME...and the passage from isaiah 55:12'...thank you God...a reminder that you KNOW me...in the examining room the doctor said, 'why are you here?'...my only response was, 'a girl in my bible study told me she didn't like the looks of a mole'....i had no other explanation

fast forward...it IS melanoma...it is SUPERFICIAL...LEVEL ONE...curable with minor surgery...it was caught EARLY....


so...not liking attention...not wanting to make a big deal of things...i completely planned on keeping this info to myself...and then i saw that as being prideful...how would God receive any credit for how he orchestrated such a beautiful intervention on my behalf...

Isaiah 41:20
"so that people may see and know, may consider and understand, that the hand of the Lord has done this, that the Holy One of Israel has created it"

knowing how God doesn't like to waste ANY of our life experiences...
do you like the sun? do you love the beach? do you have freckles & moles? do you have the best of intentions with sunblock, but sometimes get burned?

go get checked.
right now.
make an appointment with a dermatologist.

it is so worth it.

Sunday, March 13, 2011

agnus dei

agnus dei....lamb of God.

an eventful weekend.

thursday night, a call from my brother nobody wants to get. he is following an ambulance to the hospital...gracie's been hurt.

i love my brother...love his wife...love that girl like she's my own.

me, my mom and other brother all head to de vos children's and sit in the ER w/ kirk, court & gracie.

i'll spare the details...lots of unknowns...fears...just super emotional. LOTS OF PRAYERS.

meanwhile, we know my other sis-in-law should be flying from japan at this very moment...well, zak gets a text from april...there's a tsunami warning...no flights are going anywhere. more unknowns. LOTS OF PRAYERS.

going home at 2 a.m. with no answers. just praying and expecting God to show up. one thing i've learned recently is not to pray selfishly, but to trust Him completely. and know that he will work things out for His glory...and i'll praise Him no matter what.

so after watching some ugly tsunami footage in japan at 2:30 a.m. - i realize it wont do me any good. i listened to "agnus dei"...oh, how i LOVE that song. i KNOW that's heaven in a song. it brought me so much comfort...reminded me to look UP...

He is Holy...Almighty...Worthy...He reigns...He is completely Sovereign and in control of all things.

we have the assurance of salvation...the permanence of being engraved in the palm of His hand (isaiah 49:16)

i sent that song to kirk in the hospital, because i know he likes music and i thought it would be good to listen to while they stayed up there... i told him i like thrid day's version best, but couldn't find it

God faithfully answered our prayers...Gracie came home after a couple days w/ a concussion and a skull fracture...but she'll be o.k....April finally flew out from tokyo the next day and is home safe.

i've just been so thankful for an amazing family and a gracious God...

sunday morning i'm getting ready for church... i like to listen to pandora on my i-pod, but its been acting funny lately - always cutting out. i turned it on, and what was playing? AGNUS DEI by THIRD DAY!!!!! it played the whole song, i just shut my eyes & let the words sink in....and you know what? after the last note was played, it cut out...shut off. God just wanted me to hear that song - His gift to me :)

now i'm at church...i look at the bulletin. whats the first song we are going to sing?


really?! we haven't sang that since easter...i had tears streaming down my cheeks the whole song.

i call my brother kirk, to tell him my agnus dei story...when i get done, he says, "you won't believe this...i'm just NOW watching that video you sent me, cuz i couldn't open it in the hospital"

God shows up all the time...you won't want to miss it.

Isaiah 49:16 See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands;

your walls are ever before me.

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

nine years old.

dawson jay ... nine years old ...it's true what 'they' say ...they DO grow up fast

...and we're out of the toy stage...anything football or U of M please.

go vikings!

uncle zak stopped by on his way to work and dropped off a present for dawson...auntie april is in malaysia, so zak was responsible for shopping and picking up a present...the boys thought he did excellent wrapping the present!

how did he do april? a PLAID sweatshirt (which he wore all night)...2 hats ...football cards...and $5...
he was in heaven :)

then uncle kirk, aunt court and the kiddos ...and grandma & grandpa came over for lots of fun...chicken alfredo, mac & cheese, strawberries & pound cake - ALL courtesey of costco...thank you very much :)

happy birthday sweet boy...we love you to pieces!

Monday, February 28, 2011